COCAINE BEAR

Keri Russell as Sari in "Cocaine Bear." 

When you’ve got a title like “Cocaine Bear” you know you’ve got to deliver.

Director Elizabeth Banks sort of does. Leaning into every hallmark of cheap 1980s films, she creates a film that’s every bit as outrageous as its name.

Goofy, violent and seemingly everywhere, the bear torments a who’s who of television actors, including Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Keri Russell and Margo Martindale.

The close encounters are larger than life and, at times, extremely violent. As much as a pre-teen may want to see this, it probably isn’t a good idea. Legs, fingers and a head roll in the course of a day.

On the cocaine trail: a cartel that just wants to get its hands on those bricks of Coke. Led by Ray Liotta (who, sadly, should have had a better film among his final credits), they wind up in the same space as Russell, two kids, the bear and a couple of cubs.

Who lives, who dies, who tells the story? That’s something for greater directors. Here, Banks pieces together scenes that are both over the top and disconnected. She gets a few moments (a Smokey Bear standup is a great sight gag) and a fun performance from Martindale. But a lot of this seems like it was cobbled, not created.

Based on a true story, the real cocaine bear died without attacking anyone (the drugs were, apparently, too much) so writer Jimmy Warden concocted the search-and-destroy mission and added a few gory moments that might please the “Texas Chainsaw” crowd.

Laughs exist, but they’re often dependent on the crowd who’s watching. See this on a Friday night, for example, and you’ll have more fun than you might on a Sunday afternoon.

Ferguson and Russell don’t enjoy the ride as much as Martindale and Liotta. There’s a goofy segment with Aaron Holliday, Alden Ehrenreich and O’Shea Jackson Jr. that lives up to the film’s superb trailer but it, too, drifts once Ehrenreich is pounced on by the bear.

Because this is likely to make a ton of money, expect “Cocaine Cubs” to follow. They’re still on the loose, supposedly, and just ready for a meet-and-greet with anyone toting cocaine.


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