Sarah Garrecht Gassen

The request from my dear friend was straightforward: Can you be in charge of β€œStar Wars”?

Her 6-year-old son isn’t ready to see the movies, but kids in his class are talking about it. Everyone is talking about it because of the new movie. Classmates were speaking a different language and told him they were β€œtalking Ewok.”

What is that? What does it sound like? What are Ewoks? Where do they live? Why are they called Ewoks? What are droids?

She’s only seen the original movie and that was a long time ago (but not in a galaxy far, far away).

β€œStar Wars” is a big deal. He has a lot of questions β€” questions she can’t answer. Time to call in Tia, she decided. I was honored to be asked. This is important. It’s a shared experience, something many people can talk about, serving as the same social lubricant as sports, but across a vast expanse. Our modern mythology.

I grew up without a television at home, and I remember the common language that β€œStar Wars” provided on the playground and beyond. We saw it when it came out in 1977. My backyard was the site of countless battles with our Wiffle bat or wrapping-paper-tube lightsabers.

I put tights on my head and twisted the legs into Princess Leia buns. Everyone wanted to be Han Solo or Luke. The tall kids were always Chewie. I was convinced I could understand R2-D2’s beeps and bloops. We had a connection. Still do. I’m wearing an R2-D2 jacket my husband gave me as a birthday present as I write this.

So yes, I will be in charge of β€œStar Wars.” He will know that there are only really three β€œStar Wars” movies β€” the three β€œprequels” are computer-generated literalism. They have none of the humanity of the original movies, a hero’s search played out in a story among the stars. The Force became a literal thing in those later movies, not the spiritual connection for good we believed in at the beginning. And don’t even get me started on Jar Jar Binks.

We scheduled lunch. I brought a picture book with the characters to explain who is who. He brought library books to read to me, and to learn about the ships and vehicles. We spread them out next to the chips and salsa at Micha’s, and I began to tell the story of β€œStar Wars.” It’s a story of good versus evil. It’s a made up story β€” I’m interrupted by β€œI know that, Tia, because it happens in space” β€” and it can get complicated.

I explained Luke, Princess Leia, Obi-Wan Kenobi, C3PO and R2-D2. Han Solo and Chewbacca are best friends. Chewbacca is the co-pilot on the Millenium Falcon. The Death Star looks like a planet but is a ship that can move, and it’s very, very bad.

Then came the questions.

Where does Darth Vader live? Why is the Death Star so easy to sneak onto? What does R2-D2 tell the Death Star when he connects to it? Why does the Millenium Falcon need two people to fly it? Where do they sit to fly it? How do you get into the Millenium Falcon? What does it look like on the bottom? Why does Darth Vader have a cape? Did Luke have a job on Tatooine? Does he have friends there? What’s a moisture farm? Why does he fly the X-wing? What is a Yoda?

Where does the Empire park its vehicles? Where does the Rebel Alliance park its vehicles? Why are Ewoks furry? Why doesn’t Darth Vader’s TIE Fighter need another pilot to help fly it like the Millenium Falcon does? Where did Princess Leia put the secret message in R2-D2? Was it on a piece of paper? What button did Obi-Wan press to make it play? Is Lando Calrissian a good guy or a bad guy?

We spent an hour and a half at lunch, with nonstop questions. I didn’t make things up, but these were details I’d never really thought about before. I guess the Empire parks its vehicles on the Death Star. Where else would they park them?

At one point I described R2-D2 turning off the tractor beam on the Death Star as him being like an IT guy who fixes computers in an office. Not really a great answer for a first-grader, but he was on to the next query. And the next. And the next.

Such curiosity is inspiring. I may not know all the answers to his questions, but I do know this:

The Force is strong with this one.


Become a #ThisIsTucson member! Your contribution helps our team bring you stories that keep you connected to the community. Become a member today.

Sarah Garrecht Gassen writes opinion for the Arizona Daily Star. Email her at sgassen@tucson.com and follow her on Facebook.