DEAR AMY: I am grandmother to two boys, ages 1 and 3.

My daughter, who is slightly overweight, feeds them foods high in sugar, i.e. doughnuts, pancakes with syrup, muffins, etc., for breakfast. She provides dessert after every meal.

I have noticed that the boys are now requesting desserts, candy, etc., often during the day and while eating a meal. There is obesity in my and my son-in-law’s family.

Is there anything I can do/say besides providing healthier choices when I am watching them (I watch them twice a week).

β€” Worried Grandma

Dear Worried: You and your daughter are part-time partners in raising these young boys, and if you work together, you can establish good eating habits and patterns that will have a healthy impact on the whole family. With the family history of obesity that you relate, these children are vulnerable.

You should be understanding, respectful, and frank with your daughter concerning what you are seeing when the boys are with you. There are easy ways to reset eating habits with young children, by offering them healthy snacks, foods like hummus and yogurt to dip and slurp, fruit for β€œdessert,” and by having them β€œhelp” at meal time.

It is never too early (or late) to introduce healthier practices at home, but remember to never criticize their mother’s choices while the children are at your home.

A book you should consider having in your kitchen is, β€œRaising a Healthy, Happy Eater: A Parent’s Handbook: A Stage-by-Stage Guide to Setting Your Child on the Path to Adventurous Eating,” by Dr. Nimali Fernando and Melanie Potock (2015, The Experiment).

I am also a fan of The Berenstain Bears books. These fun, easy and colorful books gently convey important value-based lessons to children, and are perfect to share with a 3-year-old.

Your grandsons might enjoy β€œThe Berenstain Bears and Too Much Junk Food,” by Stan and Jan Berenstain (1985, Random House). Look for it while you’re at your local library’s storytime.


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Contact Amy Dickinson at:

askamy@amydickinson.com