When the director of the local Shakespeare Under the Stars production of "As You Like It" paired Clare Cox and Richard Applebaugh to read lines for auditions, they had no idea what roles they'd end up playing in each other's lives. Â
Sure, they both thought the other was cute, but weren't sure how to proceed, since a bad date could make performing together awkward.Â
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As the cast hung out more and got to know each other, Clare learned that Richard was originally cast in "Much Ado About Nothing" two years before that, as was she. But, they didn't meet back then because he had to leave before rehearsals started.Â
Two days before her birthday, Richard brought drinks for the cast to celebrate. Their first date was two days after her birthday.
"We met at El Parador and he picked me up there and we went to the foothills and saw the movie, "Chicago," and had Starbucks," Clare recalled. "It was a nice first date. I figured since he asked me out, the risk was less intense since we were both interested."
Both interested, indeed. The couple has been together 14 years and have had two children together.Â
"It was fate," Richard said.
Clare Cox and Richard Applebaugh all dressed up for "As You Like It."
First impressions
Clare: He just seemed really nice, which hadn't been the case in the past. I had been dumped like the week before rehearsal, so I was like 'men! I hate men.' But, then I met this really nice guy.
Richard: My first impression was I thought she was cute and had a good sense of humor.
Favorite qualities
Clare: I like that we just love being around each other. Whether it's errands or just hanging out or going someplace special. We don't have 'these are my interests and these are yours.' I'll tolerate yours if you tolerate mine. We like each other's friends. He's kind, generous. He's an incredible dad. We have a beautiful family. I'm very blessed. We really do Netflix and chill.Â
Richard: I think still the sense of humor and she's easy to get along with. Not high drama and difficult. I think we're like chill and no drama.
Quirky habits
Clare: He talks to himself all the time. Sometimes it's pretty audible. I'll hear him in the other room and I'll be all 'whatcha doin honey?'
Richard: She's a bookworm...She'll sit there on the couch with her books and magazines. She'll have them all sitting next to her, like three magazines and a book. It's kinda funny.Â
And she has this thing when she messes with her lip when she's watching TV.
Favorite date places
Clare: We used to go to Plush, the Surly Wench. Now we like going places for kids. We still love the Desert Museum. We've gone to Augustine and we like Roadhouse Cinema.
Richard: As we've grown up more and had kids, they're not the same. We go to Roadhouse Cinema because we can knock out dinner and a movie in the same place. It's pretty much one of our standby go-tos.
You're the one
Clare: I know I started to have really intense feelings for him probably sooner than him. We had been dating a couple months and I had planned a vacation with my mom and sister and I was like wow I don't really want to go. I'm really gonna miss him. And that's when I said in my head 'oh I really like him.'
Richard: The relationship probably took the most serious turn, if I had to put one place and time, was when we did this show in Bisbee. It was the last show together. The whole cast, in a very odd twist, we did the show here in Tucson, then they brought us to Bisbee and we all stayed in different hotels and little bed and breakfasts. That was the weekend where we were away from Tucson and it was very romantic. That was where I said I love you, where we figured we're not just dating anymore. We're together. That was the turning point.Â
Coping with hard times
Clare: Our son has epilepsy. He was diagnosed in 2014. It's been pretty rough. We have definitely clung to each other. He's five and we have a daughter that's three.
Richard: That was one of those things that came out of the clear blue sky...And it's ongoing. When you have to fight for stuff and you're both on the same side of that it makes you stronger.
Advice for new couples
Clare: We make it work because we're friends and we're kind to each other and we enjoy each other.
Richard: Don't worry if it's not always hot passionate. Those are things that come and go through your life. I think a lot of people get spooked when they're like 'it's been a while, this must be over.' But, it's not.
Something they hope to pass onto their kids
Clare: I hope they always have a love for learning or a curiosity about life whether it's a college education or not.Â
Richard: Patience is such a simple thing...Don't rush to try to make it all happen right now. Enjoy the time that you're in. Just slow down and have some patience.
