If the weather forecast proves to be accurate, we are looking at some scorchers this weekend, with temperatures hovering at between 103 and 105 degrees Friday-Sunday.

That makes us incredibly sad.

And the best way to ease the โ€œIโ€™m-so-hot-I-could-dieโ€ sadness is by laughing.

What a great weekend for that!

Three ha-ha shows โ€” two of them straight up comedy shows, the other a freakishly funny fast-food parody on one of heavy metalโ€™s most iconic bands โ€” are heading our way.

  • Actor/comedian Felipe Esparza brings his โ€œThe Bad Hambre Tourโ€ to Desert Diamond Casino on Friday, July 26.

No itโ€™s not a political statement about the controversies surround the U.S.-Mexico border. Esparza, 43, doesnโ€™t really traffic in political comedy.

โ€œWe call it the โ€˜Bad Hambreโ€™ tour because (if it was) โ€˜Bad Hombres,โ€™ nobody would show up except ICE,โ€ he said, a statement that was about as political as he would take it.

โ€œI try to find a balance where I can make it funny without upsetting both sides,โ€ he explained. โ€œI donโ€™t have many political jokes because they donโ€™t last the test of time. My jokes will be funny today, tomorrow, 20 years from now.โ€

His show traces his life, from being abused by his parents and his own battles with drugs to being a horrible father to the three kids โ€” โ€œthat I know of.โ€ But he frames all the darkness in humor.

โ€œI did my ancestry DNA test. Big mistake. They opened up another child support case on me,โ€ joked Esparza, who is filming the pilot for the Netflix drama โ€œGentefiedโ€ and has a recurring role in the NBC sitcom โ€œSuperstore.โ€

His 18-and-older show at Desert Diamond, 1100 W. Pima Mine Road, starts at 8 p.m. Tickets are $25 to $35 through startickets.com

  • Would you like fries with your heavy metal?

Or, more aptly, your drive-thru metal, borrowing the melodies of English rock legends Black Sabbath and singing the lyrics more geared toward ordering a double-cheeseburger and a milkshake from your favorite fast-food franchise. That pretty much sums up Black Sabbath parody act Mac Sabbath, which teams up with Phoenixโ€™s Okilly Dokilly โ€” a so-called โ€œNedalโ€ band whose music is based almost entirely on quotes from โ€œThe Simpsonsโ€ character Ned Flanders. (Sorry, we canโ€™t stop laughing at the thought.)

The all-ages Rialto Theatre show starts at 8 p.m. at 191 Toole, 191 E. Toole Ave. Tickets are $18 in advance through 191toole.com

  • Motherhood can be so heart-wrenching and frustrating youโ€™ll want to drink. Or laugh, which is what the momma comedy duo of Kristin Hensley and Jen Smedley will have you doing when they bring their โ€œI Mom So Hardโ€ show to the AVA at Casino del Sol on Friday, July 26. Hereโ€™s how they describe it: โ€œTwo moms. (Not married.) (Actually, married. Just not to each other.) Four kids. Two husbands. Three dogs. Two glasses of wine โ€” to start. Lots of laughs.โ€

Their comedy will resurrect all the trivial craziness moms experience from the sleepless nights of newborn-babydom to the angst you share when those sweet snot-nosed bundles of poopy diapers graduate to teens.

Yes, there will be plenty of drinking.

The show starts at 8 p.m. at the AVA, 5655 W. Valencia Road. Tickets are $20 to $50, with VIP seats available through tickets.casinodelsol.com


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Contact reporter Cathalena E. Burch at cburch@tucson.com or 573-4642. On Twitter @Starburch