New U of A grad didn't speak English 'til teens, now speaks 5 languages

In 1981, earning a college degree was one of the furthest things from Carol Kay’s mind.

Back then, she was 15 years old and relieved to be alive. She had finally found refuge with family in Anaheim, California, after escaping one of the deadliest ethnic cleansing campaigns in modern history. In 1975, the Khmer Rouge ascended to power in Kay’s native Cambodia and murdered some 2 million Cambodians over the next four years.

Kay survived and, after relocating to California, enrolled in school. But she only spoke Khmer, her native language, and found it difficult to communicate with her peers. “It was very, very scary,” Kay, now 57, recalls. “I hardly talked to anyone. I would just go from school to home and do my homework.”

More than 40 years later, she’s come full circle.

This week, Kay, who now speaks five languages, is graduating from the University of Arizona with an education degree and aspires to teach English abroad. Two of her three children, Harry and Anthony Chhieu, are also graduating from the UA this week. And their whole family knows how much Kay sacrificed to get them all to this point.

Those sacrifices started almost as soon as Kay arrived in California as a teenager.

Her family stressed the importance of school, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to get through it if she couldn’t read or write English. So she went to school during the day and at night she took English courses designed non-native speakers. She caught on quickly. But as a requirement to graduate high school, she also had to pass foreign language courses, and Khmer was not offered as an option. That’s how she learned French, too.

During and after high school, Kay worked full-time for her family’s donut shop and eventually opened her own. It was there that she learned her fourth language: Spanish.

“I had this donut shop and a lot of our customers were Hispanic and spoke Spanish,” she said. “I thought there was no reason why I shouldn’t be able to speak with these people. I took a few Spanish classes thinking I could pick it up and sure enough I did.”

On top of running a business, she was also married with three children. Despite her talent for learning new languages, college didn’t seem like it would ever fit into her life.

“When I came to the U.S. I knew I didn’t want to be frying french fries for a living,” Kay said. “But there was never any money for school. The opportunity seemed like it would never come.”

Back to homepage

Subscriber Login

Keep reading with a digital access subscription.

Subscribe now

It didn’t for a while.

Kay eventually divorced her husband and moved herself and her three young children from California to Tucson. When they first arrived in Tucson, she got a job teaching preschool and focused on providing a supportive home for her kids.

“A lot of my family emphasized academics above everything else. But my mom just pushed us all to be happy,” Harry Chhieu, who is also graduating with a mechanical engineering degree from the UA this week. “Growing up with her — seeing her do everything on her own as a single mom — made me have so much respect for her. She made me who I am.”

Once Kay’s kids got a little older, she started to pursue the college degree she once thought was out of reach. She took classes at Pima Community College, and it was there that she learned her fifth language: Chinese. “I had some friends from China who spoke the language,” she said of her motivation. “After graduation, I want to visit them there and speak their language.”

After graduating with an associate’s degree from PCC, Kay transferred to the UA and started working toward a bachelor’s degree alongside her two sons.

“I’m not sure where I would be without her hard work,” said Kay’s other son, Anthony Chhieu, who is graduating with a criminal justice degree. “With everything that she’s been through — being uprooted from her home and not knowing any English — it makes my life seem like a piece of cake.”

The trio doesn’t have any extravagant plans to celebrate graduation, but they’re all looking ahead to bright futures. For Kay, this next chapter after graduation is filled with the possibilities of traveling, teaching English abroad and building a new career.

Whatever she does in the years ahead, she said she’ll never forget the English teachers who helped her adjust to her new life in the United States more than 40 years ago.

“It feels great,” Kay said. “I want to be able to give it back to the community that helped me and say I was there once, too. This is where I came from.”

Historic photos: A look back at University of Arizona Commencement ceremonies