Minus a few inches and it would have been the equivalent of a sail down the Santa Cruz.
In late September we embarked on one of those European waterways cruises you see advertised on TV. You know, the ones that show passengers relaxing onboard while their ship glides by centuriesโ-old castles and monasteries.
Turns out, thatโs what we got, thanks to one of the few river lines able to handle the Danubeโs low water levels, following an extreme drought plaguing much of Europe. No, Iโm not naming the line. It starts with โAโ and ends with โN.โ Do your own Googling.
Our 12-day journey took us through five Central European countries, three currencies, four languages and enough pastry shops to spike a permanent sugar high.
Bookended by hotel stays in Budapest and Prague, our seven actual days on the Danube would see our ship sliding through a dozen locks and 362 miles of river water โ some of it only a few inches deep, some of it so high that the wheelhouse of the ship had to be lowered in order to slip beneath the riverโs many bridges.
First stop: Landing in Budapest, Hungary, which is two cities โ Buda on one side of the Danube, and Pest (pronounced โpeshtโ by the locals) on the other side. The city is gorgeously lit up at night, especially the 1849 suspension Chain Bridge.
The second day we toured the older parts of the city, where our guide โ American born-and-raised but back because of family and marriage โ introduced us to equal doses of 11th century history and 20th century communist rule. The first was handled with reverence, the latter with utter disdain โ a refrain we would hear again and again from our guides in Slovakia and later the Czech Republic. The world may be a puzzling place, but of this I am certain: Here, the Iron Curtain is forever tattered.
A pouring rain kept us from exploring Budapest on our third day before embarking that afternoon. We sailed with champagne glasses in hand and strains of โThe Love Boatโ theme seeping into our ears. Corny? You bet. But hey, this was going to be a fun time.
And so it was, thanks to a bear-hug-of-a-German captain, a Hungarian cruise director who patiently answered every question and concern, and a friendly, efficient crew โ many from Indonesia. All spoke English, some haltingly, many proficiently. Most fly home in late October for three months with their families.
The passenger list of about 160 souls included Americans, Canadians, Australians and at least one couple from Finland. There was one couple who looked to be still in their 20s on honeymoon. Same for a couple in their 80s. It was a good mix and by the end, many were on a first-name basis.
Over the next six days we would tour towns and cities in Slovakia, Austria and Germany, taking in various museums and concerts while noting the obvious pride residents have in their culture and history. Vienna, renowned for its music and baroque architecture, was the topper. We had two full days there to explore โ not nearly enough.
Also in Austria we cruised the Wachau Valley, with its vineyards and apricot orchards, toured the magnificent Benedictine Abbey in Melk, and visited Grein โ a village so perfect it looks like it belongs on a Disneyland set. We also walked through a gritty, older section of Linz, Adolf Hitlerโs seldom-mentioned hometown. Some took a sobering tour of the nearby Nazi slave labor camp, Mauthausen.
Our river tour ended with a bus ride through the Bavarian Forest โ I expected to see Little Red Riding Hood at any minute โ toward Prague, capital of the Czech Republic. Home to Mozart and Kafka, the Charles Bridge, and the Astronomical Clock, Prague is also destination for tens of thousands of tourists and their selfie sticks.
Best after-trip tips: Wear your jeans โ theyโre a status symbol; keep local coins handy for public bathrooms; drink wine in Austria, beer in Prague; allow at least three hours to get through customs at JFK International Airport; and smile โ itโs understood in any language.
Best take-away memory: a classical concert held in the baroque Mirror Chapel in Pragueโs Old Town, with music from Bach, Vivaldi, Mozart, Puccini, and Verdi performed by some of the Czech Republicโs most accomplished musicians and soloists.
Perfect ending to an almost-perfect trip โ on a river that thankfully never ran dry.
