Esquer vs. Esquer Round 2 would have to wait.
Stanford baseball coach David Esquer, father of Arizona infielder Xavier Esquer, missed the first two games of the Cardinal-Wildcats series at Hi Corbett Field on Friday and Saturday. He had a valid excuse.
Michael Lev is a senior writer/columnist for the Arizona Daily Star, Tucson.com and The Wildcaster.
David Esquer traveled across the country this week to attend his daughter’s graduation from the University of South Carolina. The ceremony was scheduled for Saturday morning. Esquer planned to fly to Phoenix on Saturday night and be in Tucson in time for Sunday’s series finale.
Esquer has been the head coach in more 1,350 college baseball games. His daughter graduating from college? That happens only once.
“I spend so much time with other parents’ kids. That’s my job,” said Esquer, who had never missed a game in 25 years as a head coach before Friday. “There’s even been many times where Xavier was in high school playing baseball” — at Palo Alto High — “and I didn’t get to watch his games because I was spending time with other dads’ sons while they were playing.
Arizona infielder Xavier Esquer, shown during the Mexican Baseball Fiesta last October, plays like the son of a coach. His dad, David Esquer, is the head coach at Stanford.
“This was one of the events that I promised my daughter I wasn’t gonna miss.”
Anyone who has a job and a family knows how hard it can be to find balance between the two. Now imagine being a Division I head coach — especially in the transfer-portal era, when the offseason is basically nonexistent.
It would have been considerably easier for David and Xavier to spend quality time together if the younger Esquer had elected to attend and play for Stanford, which also happens to be his father’s alma mater. But Xavier wanted to do his own thing. His father supported the move, even if it meant Xavier would be playing for a conference rival (for now, anyway).
“I had a lot of respect for it,” David Esquer said. “He wants to establish himself as his own baseball player. He doesn’t want to feel like he gets anything because his dad is a Division I coach.”
Playing for a program other than Stanford also offers the possibility to attain something Xavier couldn’t get on The Farm: Bragging rights.
Stanford coach David Esquer and his son, Arizona infielder Xavier Esquer, pose after the two teams squared off on April 8 in Stanford, California.
“I want to beat everyone. That’s just the nature of the game. That’s who I am,” said Xavier Esquer, a redshirt freshman. “But it’s even sweeter when you beat your dad.”
Round 1 took place April 8 at Stanford. Xavier Esquer made his third start of the season, playing second base, and helped the Wildcats trounce the Cardinal 12-1. Two days after logging his first collegiate hit at Cal, Esquer went 1 for 3 with an RBI and a walk. He also made a handful of sharp defensive plays.
David Esquer described the experience of facing his son as “different” but “fun.” Xavier called it “incredible.”
Xavier’s mom, Lynn, who usually sits right behind the Stanford dugout, sat directly behind the plate, favoring neither side. Father and son met after the game and took a picture to commemorate the occasion.
“I want to cherish those moments,” David Esquer said. “We can look back on those when it’s all said and done and appreciate our time together.
“I’m proud of him. You never know what your son can do. To see him get an opportunity to be on such a good team like Arizona … I know how difficult it is to earn a spot.”
Stanford coach David Esquer challenges a call during the 2023 College World Series in Omaha, Nebraska — the third in a row featuring the Cardinal.
David Esquer grew up in Salinas, California, which is about 30 minutes northeast of Pebble Beach. His playing career at Stanford overlapped with Chip Hale’s; both played from 1984-87 and were selected in the ’87 MLB Draft. Arizona won the College World Series in 1986; Stanford won it the following year.
Hale and his staff liked what they saw of Xavier Esquer at an Area Code Games event. He played like the son of a coach.
“He was a gamer,” Hale said. “He played the game the right way. Obviously, he’s got the bloodlines.”
David Esquer knew Xavier would be in good hands at Arizona.
“Every time I see Chip,” David Esquer said, “the only thing I have for him is: ‘Thank you for everything you’ve done for my son.’ ”
Because he’s had a decades-long career in baseball, David Esquer was “different than the typical travel-ball dad,” Xavier Esquer said. “He wasn’t … living through my success. He wanted to help me find success, but he wouldn’t get angry if I was failing.”
Arizona State players duck as Arizona's Xavier Esquer, left, pursues a pop foul into the Sun Devils dugout during the first inning of their Pac-12 game at Hi Corbett Field on March 16.
This is the element of their relationship I find most fascinating and instructive. Similar to how he handled Xavier’s recruitment, David gave his son the room to find his own way as a ballplayer. David Esquer went so far as to label his approach as “non-intrusive.”
“I wanted him to develop on his own,” David Esquer said. “People ask me all the time how much I instructed him when he was young. I’d just put on my AirPods, put on some country music, and I threw to him until he said he was done.
“Not that I wouldn’t have a little feedback if necessary, but not much. I just wanted him to understand if he did put in the miles, he would see results. I didn’t have to give him a hitting lesson or a baseball lesson on a daily basis. It was just about showing up every day and trying to inch forward.”
Xavier said that when the two of them talk, David is “definitely more father than coach.” He dubbed his dad’s approach as “loose in a good way.”
“He’s been there for me the whole time,” Xavier Esquer said. “But he definitely knew when to lay off the gas.”
David had some simple but useful advice for Xavier: Play with energy and support your teammates. Not much more needed to be said.
“He understands that there’s no expectation on my side, no push,” David Esquer said. “It does nothing for my identity to make sure that my son is also successful (at baseball).”
After redshirting last year, Xavier Esquer pushed for a starting job but didn’t get one. He has tried to follow his dad’s advice by being the best teammate he can be.
Xavier sounds like a coach when he talks about his situation (“You can’t be a selfish baseball player in a scenario like this”) or Arizona’s 24-8 midweek loss to Grand Canyon (“We know that where we’re headed is a good place; our process is gonna bring us success”). His father, who never progressed past high-A as a player, clearly had a positive influence on him.
As recently as the 2021 CWS, they were on the same side when it came to college baseball. Stanford eliminated Arizona in Omaha.
“At that point I was cheering for Stanford,” said Xavier, who committed to the Wildcats about three months later. “But definitely not anymore.”
Arizona freshman Andrew Cain discusses his journey from Ironwood Ridge High School to the U of A, including a detour in Pullman, Washington (video by Michael Lev / Arizona Daily Star)
