Mason Sipe's legacy is all over his family's home.
You see it when you first walk up to the house, in a mosaic bench gifted to the family after the 9-month-old died in May 2012.
You see it in the Mason garden out back — a planter blooming with flowers, colorful pinwheels, Ben's Bells and angel wings.
You see it all around the house, in photographs of the baby beaming in a plaid shirt and cowboy hat, in the wall nook full of mementos to a life cut short, in the faces and mannerisms of Madison, 3, and Jameson, almost 9 months, both of whom will never meet their brother in this life.
But they will know him.
Joshua and Jessica Sipe with their firstborn Mason Sipe.
Because Mason never got to celebrate his first birthday, hundreds of other children do — through The Love Every Day Foundation, an organization the family started after his death. The 9-month-old taught the Sipe family to love every day and love big.
So that's what they do now.
Following the unexpected death of their firstborn child, Joshua and Jessica Sipe wanted a way for people to remember their son. They shared the phrase "love every day" with friends and family at the funeral, says Jessica Sipe, 33.
"We wanted some sort of message that could just stay with people to think of Mason and live for him..." says Sipe, a lead financial analyst for Raytheon. "Aug. 1 was his birthday, and we sent out little postcards to friends and family instead of birthday invitations and said, 'Spend Aug. 1 spreading love and happiness in memory of Mason.'"
Joshua and Jessica Sipe sent this postcard to family and friends on Aug. 1, 2012 — what would have been Mason's first birthday.
The hardest thing
When Mason was born, complications forced an emergency surgery at 5-days-old.
"That was a really scary thing, and my mom said, 'This will be the hardest thing you have to go through, watching your baby be sick and in the hospital, but you can make it through,'" Sipe says. "Then the unthinkable happened, and how do you make it through that? I chose to love for him because he doesn't get that chance."
After the surgery, doctors sent the family home with a clean bill of health. Mason's death in May came quickly and unexpectedly, leaving the family in shock and with half-dreamed plans for a first birthday party.
Instead of wearing Aloha shirts to a first birthday luau, the family donned them for a funeral and reception, says Andrea Martinez, a cousin of Sipe's.
"Nobody ever gets over losing their child," Sipe says. "As moments of sadness hit me, I go, 'Okay, I need to do something to make someone else happy,' and that's what gets me through."
That's how The Love Every Day Foundation began, giving the family a chance to give back to other children instead of focusing on their own loss. Every year on Mason's birthday, they throw a huge birthday bash for foster children.
"It's been really helpful to take that sadness and turn it into a celebration," Martinez says.
Sipe has also chosen to fight the fear that could steal the joy she finds in Madison and Jameson. She learned that after her pregnancy with Madison — a season filled with anxiety.
It's a little harder now, as Jameson approaches the 9-month mark.
"He looks a lot like Mason, and little things he does remind me of Mason," she says.
Jameson, left, and Madison, right, both have the letters of Mason's name in theirs.
But she has chosen to love every day anyway. For Jameson. For Madison. For Mason.
Happy birthday to Mason
The Sipes call Mason "the happiness."
"He was the happiest baby in the world," Sipe says. "He smiled at everyone and would look at you, waiting for you to look at him and then smile."
The family knew someone who mentored a child living in group foster housing through Gap Ministries and decided to turn Mason's birthday into a celebration.
They purchased toys and baked cupcakes to deliver to the home.
That's a big deal for foster kids, many of whom don't get to have birthday parties, says Martinez, a clinical coordinator for a local mental health center. Using her experience in behavioral health, Martinez helped the Sipes connect to resources and navigate the needs of kids living in foster care.
"It took a really sad day and turned it into doing something good," Sipe says. "It felt good to see the kids excited about random presents and getting a cupcake on a random day."
That birthday party grew into The Love Every Day Foundation— a chance for the Sipe family and their friends to share the love they would have showered on Mason.
"We share with the kids what this is about and why they're doing it, and it shows them that even through bad things, you can make it into something good and do something good for other people," says Tiffany Clauer, a program director for Gap Ministries.
The Love Every Day Foundation is now able to throw one large birthday party for all 14 of the ministry's group homes, known as Splash Houses, on Mason's birthday. That's about 130 kids who get to look forward to a carnival-style blow-out complete with jumping castles, snow cones and presents for every kid, Clauer says.
To the Sipes, all of these children matter. Every day matters.
Sipe imagines fundraising enough to celebrate with all of Gap Ministries' foster children, not just the ones in Splash Houses. She also sees a future providing birthday budgets for foster parents or offering other parents who have lost children a chance to share their child's birthday with a kid in foster care.
The parties "feel like joy and chaos all at once," Sipe says. "It gives me chills to think about. Because of this little boy, these kids get to have a happy day."
Part of loving every day is teaching others to do the same, and Sipe hopes that working with foster children will remind them of their value and worth.
The Love Every Day Foundation also organizes a semi-annual roadside clean-up (the next one is in March) and raises money for parties through crowd-sourcing, yard sales and donations. This year, the organization will apply to become a nonprofit.
"I kind of think (Love Every Day) was born right when Mason passed away and we gave that phrase away to friends and families to love everyday, and it has only grown since then," Sipe says. "At that moment I didn't know I wanted to start nonprofit, but it has shaped over the years."
Cherishing the moments
Already, the Sipes are teaching their children about their older brother. Shutterfly books full of pictures and a quilt made of his old clothes tell the story.
When Madison doesn't want to share a toy that was Mason's with her younger brother, Sipe reminds her that Mason shared with her.
Driving by the cemetery, Madison will blow her brother a kiss. Both children have the letters of Mason's name in theirs.
"She knows that Mason is her brother and knows that he is in heaven and doesn't fully grasp what that is," Sipe says. "The other day she said, 'Can we go on an airplane to heaven?' And I said, 'I wish.'"
Sipe treasures her two children and doesn't take moments for granted. Love Every Day is more than a logo. It is a lifestyle.
"We still get frustrated and still have bad days, but in spite of that, you can always remember there is something about the day that is good and something about that person you can love and something about yourself that you can love, even if you're mad at yourself..." Sipe says. "I'm not more lenient on Madison and Jameson, but I feel a closeness to them that might not have been there."
For that, for all of it, the family has Mason to thank.
You can follow Jessica Sipe on Instagram at @adayinthelifeofmybelly_ww360. Here, Sipe has chronicled her health and fitness journey. She was also a 2016 winner of 40 Under 40, which is sponsored by the Arizona Daily Star and the Tucson Hispanic Chamber of Commerce.
